I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Alive.
So much puke
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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