singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
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