I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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