That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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