the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
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