I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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