I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Randomize
