don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
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