Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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