I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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