Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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