she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
