Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
