I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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