i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
