do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
