Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
