Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
She made me pour olive oil on her.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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