Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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