He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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