ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Randomize
