Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize