Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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