Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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