yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
