I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
