I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
