I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Randomize
