Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
