Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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