i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize