So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize