Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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