we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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