i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Watching her eat just hurts me
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
