yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
