Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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