You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
