Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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