Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
