And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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