I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
