Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
How's work?
Spinning.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
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