Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
