hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Randomize
