R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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