he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize