Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Soap is not a condiment
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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