Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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