Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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