I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Randomize