i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
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