your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I have so many feelings about this burrito
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
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